Summer vacation has officially begun. Gus and Greta both had their last days at school last Thursday - first grade for him, last year of preschool for her - and my excitement for putting away both the lunch bags and book bags for a few months now gives way to a new routine and the logistics of doing errands and things as a threesome again. My quiet hours alone, the few I had during the week, are over until the end of August when we slide back into a new school routine.
Over the course of hours home, many spent (hopefully) outside in the yard, I'm hoping to work back into this space. I have so many posts started or the subject saved, ready to be made into something, but the words just haven't been free to come. I have been completely stuck when it comes to creativity, drive, flow for months now, feeling totally sapped for energy that requires more brain power than house chores. The correct word for this may be "defeated" though I don't remember actively giving up - it just kind of happened over the course of the past few month. So many things little house and family have taken precedence over my own that I feel like it's going to be hard to get back on track. Sometimes I wonder if I'm still meant to have my own business or if I should just let it go and try to find something else to fill my time, though with what, I have no idea.
And so for now I sit in limbo, not really being able to move forward on any one thing while the kids are always home, though I hope that maybe getting myself to blog again will help unlock something that's been dormant for so long. I just hope that some of you are still out there to read it.