The Itch.
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My husband is from the South. Born and raised in Houston and later living in Florida, he craves warm temperatures and humidity. He loves live oak trees and sitting out on the screen porch in a rainstorm. To say he loves a good New England winter would be a gross overstatement, especially after the winter we just had. And now that spring has sprung, his eyes have swelled up and he's constantly sneezing from something unknown that gives him allergies as soon as things start to green up. If he leaves New England, as he just did for a business trip to Chicago, the allergies go away, so it's something specific to where we live. So let's just say Connecticut is not his favorite place and he would love to move back South.
In one part of my mind, I would love to move. I certainly wouldn't mind not dealing with snow removal; coats, hats, scarves, boots, and more times two small children plus myself; the endless cold through what is becoming a solid six months of winter. I would love to be able to be out walking the dog year-round, swimming all the time, and wearing sandals, my favorite footwear of choice. Moreover, I love the idea of change. I love the idea of starting over in a new space, which is crazy considering how hard we've worked to renovate this one. I feel that itch to go elsewhere and see what's out there away from the place I've always lived. Herein lies the problem.
I have always lived in Connecticut. Always. I lived in one house my whole life until I got an apartment with my bestie when I started teaching. My parents mentioned moving once when I was little and I talked them out of it. Anxiety attacks prevented me from going away to college, so I commuted to a local school. I was going to take a teaching job in Florida and live with my in-laws for a bit but had such a panic attack on the way down I turned around and came back. Moving away is not my friend. For the most part, my whole family is here (and it's a big one) and we see them often. None of us has ever strayed too far. I fear not having my support system if we were that far, and my personality type doesn't make me run out to find new friends. So there's this constant push and pull. I do love the idea of southern living but would anxiety take over again?
Because I am part of the blogging community, I have the advantage of seeing into different towns and cities. I see people packing up and moving far away with excitement and adventure, and when they get to their destination, they are so happy with their choice and their new home and a fresh start. I want that. I want that ability and that adventurous spirit and that get-up-and-go. I don't want to be worried about what might be, and I don't want to panic about anything. I am jealous of those who make the journey.
So while we have no plans to go anywhere or do anything, this is what has been on my mind lately. Do you ever feel that need to make a big change? Or have you already done it? Do you have a fear of moving, or are you happy where you are? (And how awesome are those houses up there??)
